Dear Ms. Feverfew:
I have four sisters. Six brothers. Two step-sisters. Three step-brothers. Nine sisters-in-law. Six brothers-in-laws. I have a mother-in-law. A new and improved dad. A mom. That means I have 34 people with whom I have some sort of familial relationship.
Guess how many of them emailed, texted, called, tweeted, facebooked, or otherwise acknowledged yesterday was my birthday?
That would be zero. Nada. Zilch.
Now, I am not the sort to make a big deal out of my birthday – I don’t have it listed on Facebook or any other social networking sight as it merely serves as a painful reminder of all I have not done right and have not accomplished. But….
It would have been nice to have had at least one person other than my husband and two sons acknowledge I am alive.
I mean, I can totally understand the 300+ people at the Trunk-or-Treat at church last night not knowing it was my birthday. I can accept the fact my Visiting Teachers walked right past me several times on the way to the food tables and didn’t even acknowledge me because I am still new in the ward, and like I said, I don’t advertise my birthday far and wide. But my family? My mom? Am I really that forgettable of a person?
I tried not to complain about it throughout the day, but as the day wore on, my resolve wore down. At about 8:30 last night, I locked myself in the bathroom, filled the tub until is was nearly overflowing, sank into it neck deep, and had myself a good long cry. I didn’t come out until the water was cool and I was starting to shiver.
I had hoped a scalding hot bath, a good cry, and morning would bring an attitude adjustment and a new perspective, but it hasn’t. I don’t remember every having such an unpleasant birthday. And to top it all off, for some stupid reason, this is the first year it *really* sank deep into my soul and my psyche: You didn’t know it was my birthday, either.
Adoption, the gift that keeps giving.
P.S. Edited on 10/27 to add: My mom didn’t forget after all. I received a very lovely, very sweet birthday card from her and my New and Improved Dad in the mail today. I also had a sister post something on my Facebook account early this morning, remarking how she knows my birthday is sometime around this time of year, but couldn’t remember what day because there are so many of us. And she is right, there are a lot of us.