So…well…my Bishop wants me to meet with a counselor from LDSFS because according to this therapist, “things are so much different now” than they were “back then.” (Tell that to Alyssa and other young mothers just like her, Brother LDSFS therapist dude).
This is what my intuition is telling me.
It is a trap.
Not one being set by my Bishop – he is too new and unawares of the subtle (and not so subtle) coersive tactics of LDSFS. It feels like a trap being set by the counselor, the one encouraging my Bishop to have me come in so we can “talk.”
The last thing I need right now is to be “talked to” by some self-righteous, all-knowing adoption broker thinly disguised as a “therapist” or “counselor.” The absolute last thing I need is to have yet another representative of my church tell me that I am wrong, that my feelings don’t really exist because research says they shouldn’t, and that there must be something wrong in my life since I am still grieve losing you to the gaping jaws of adoption.
I really don’t have the fight in me right now to confront this
therapist adoption broker’s erroneous belief about how “it’s all about love” and that I didn’t “give her up, I gave her more.”
That’s where I am tonight…tired and not willing to engage in the argument that is certain to ensue if I were to make the appointment with this particular individual.Plus, getting “counseling” from LDSFS almost feels like consorting with the enemy…