Is it just me?

Dear Ms. Feverfew –

Is it just me or is there a serious lack of counselors/therapists who have been trained in adoption loss/natural parent issues? Methinks that I might be getting PhD in the wrong field…

I need to find one nearby – I can’t afford a 4400 mile round-trip commute to see Dr. Dave right now.

Any suggestions?

Much love –


9 thoughts on “Is it just me?

  1. I couldn’t find any around my area either. Most therapists who claim to specialize in adoption believe in the same sunshine and roses as the others and have no clue how to even recognize or address the grief and loss it covers.

    The therapist I finally found a few years ago and who has helped me immensely was one who specialized in grief and trauma and PTSD. And since I’ve been seeing her she has actually researched and studied more into how adoption is related to such things.

    So you could always go that route and see if you have any better luck.

    It definitely is an area where there is not many who truly understand or know how to help. That is one of the reasons my oldest son, an adoptee, is in school now to become a therapist who specializes in adoption issues and troubled teens so that he can help where he was failed as a teenager and adoptee himself.

    Good luck! I know it’s hard!

    • Cassi –

      Thanks for the tips – this should be quite an adventure! I don’t know how I lucked out the first time finding a therapist who fit my needs so perfectly, even though he didn’t have a real specialty in “adoption issues.” I hope that this time around I get as lucky and can find someone who can help me through this latest round of “stuff.”


  2. NO it isn’t just you! It took me a long time to find a good therapist who could deal with these issues- Which is why I am working towards and MSW and eventually LCSW so I can do therapy for moms like us, and adoptees~

    • Brilliant Mary! It is seriously pathetic how under-served this population (adoptees and natural parents) is in the mental health professions, especially when one considers how many people in the US are adopted!

      Crazy. That’s all there is too it.

      • It is crazy- and I am dead serious about doing something about this- maybe I can be a travelling therapist?

      • Hmmm – not a bad idea Mary! The only hurdle would be licensing requirements across state lines. How much longer do you have left? (I don’t think I need to ask what your thesis/culminating project will be about 😉 ).

      • About three years- and frankly I am wondering about the state lines too- and no you don’t need to ask! LOL My psych teacher this semester is an adoptee- oy it’s interesting to listen to her!

      • You know you don’t need a PHD to become a therapist right? MSW and the things that go with it- but you don’t have to have a PHd

      • Yeah…but I am so far into this Ph.D. in Instructional Technology and Learning Sciences that I don’t feel like I can back out now. Seriously, I am 85% of the way done.

        Maybe after I have had some time to decompress from graduate school I can go back & get a MSW or LCHW degree. Between my undergrad in Psy and my MS I have about half the coursework done already.

        But right now I need a nap. A girl needs to have her priorities.

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