LDS Policy on Adoptees Searching for Their Birth Parents

Dear Ms. Feverfew –

In case you were curious as to what the LDS church’s official stance is on searching for family of origin, here is it, straight from the Handbook of Instructions.

Adopted Children and Their Natural Parents (p. 173)

Local Church leaders should discourage adopted children and their adoptive parents from seeking to identify the children’s natural parents.  When adopted children have genetic or medical problems, the family may seek medical information about the natural parents but should be discouraged from seeking their identities.

(The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (2006). Church Handbook of Instructions: Book 1 Stake Presidencies and Bishoprics 2006.  Salt Lake City: UT.)

And this is why I despair of ever reuniting after relinquishing you within the LDS Family Services system.

In spite of this, I am doing the work necessary so that when and if you ever do decide to contact me, I will be ready and hopefully we can avoid the missteps and mistakes other mothers and daughters who have been reunited make. At least that is my plan.  As we know, reality is usually fraught with much more messiness than the clean, organized plans I come up with in the wee small hours of the morning.

Much love,


P.S. February 17, 2011: Just thought I would update this post. Things are changing within the LDS adoption community, in particular this outdated and archaic stance on adoptees and their natural families. Read more about it HERE.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s